Nardwuar vs. Slayer
The Jacket!

Click here for the Interview in Real Audio!


  Vintage Slayer!

No but have you ever been scared by the... I would imagine some of these guys, your fans that come out, and stuff.
Tom: Yeah, there are some freakos like you that scare me. (laughs)

No, now, have you, Jeff, ever, like, took a cat and put in on the altar?
Jeff: No. I used to do that as a kid but not anymore. (laughs)

And on Donahue, do you remember that Donahue show where they had those kids on there on Donahue?
Tom: Yes. What about it?

And they said "Five out of five kids that kill listen to..."
Tom: No, it’s not Donahue. It was Geraldo. And it’s "Five out of five kids who kill listen to Slayer."

And there’s other people that are into Slayer... well, they’re into killing maybe but they will listen to Slayer. But this guy, I don’t know if you met him before but his name is Quitty. He does this zine called Hessian Obsession.
Tom: Hessian Obsession.

Hessian ObsessionHessian Obsession is the name of the zine, and he was... they went down to try and track your new drummer because he was from punk bands and stuff, he hangs out with. Your new drummer, Paul, right, or, well, he’s, he likes punk, doesn’t he? Well, you guys do all the punk too­
Tom: Well, actually he’s not our new drummer. He’s just rejoined our band again.

Coming back and forth. And on this... what they do in this zine actually is, their listeners and readers of the zine Hessian Obsession, they use Slayer lyrics in everyday life.
Tom: Oh yeah? Like what? Give an example!

Well you know, like, I was down there at the mall, uh, "severing flesh and gouging eyes" with fish!
Tom: Okay!

You know, and, like, they’d want people to use those lyrics like, "How long can you last in this frozen water burial?"
Tom and Jeff: (laugh)

It's Tom!And then they talk about, "Hey kid, better get out of the pool!"
Tom and Jeff: (laugh)

I mean, these people are totally devoted to you guys, Tom and Jeff. This Hessian Obsession zine, they even had a Slayer crossword puzzle.
Tom: Wow. (laughs)

Now, on your punk covers record, you did the song, "I Wanna Be Your Dog" but you changed it to "I Wanna Be Your...
Jeff: God."

Now, why did you change the lyrics? You changed them slightly. "Now it’s time to bury my...
Tom and Jeff: (silence)

Tom: Right.

Nardwuar, Gerald Rattlehead, Cindy Wolfe!

between your...
Tom: Keep going.

legs with your...
Jeff: ...fist?

tongue in that special...

Place! Now, Tom, what is "that special place"?
Tom: Gee, let’s see?
Jeff: Between the toes? (laughs)



Now, Tom of Slayer, were you in that movie Backstage Sluts?
Tom: No, I’ve heard about that though.

Isn’t that where the rock bands talk about their fantasies and they are interacted by porno actresses? You weren’t actually in that?
Tom: No.

Nardwuar & Dave Carswell admire Cindy's jacket!And how do you feel about the new Van Halen, that new singer, that new guy?
Tom: He sounds like Sammy Hagar.

Is it embarrassing to you? Have you seen him prancing around?
Jeff: Don’t listen. Don’t watch.
Tom: I don’t listen either. (laughs)

And in other Slayer news there with Jeff and Tom, winding up here with Jeff and Tom of Slayer... Slayer! It really is! Tom and Jeff of Slayer! Tom and Jeff of Slayer! My God, it really is! It really is! It really is! It really is! Do you know who your labelmates now are? Do you know who your labelmates now are?
Tom: Who?

You just got some new labelmates now on Sony: Cinderella, Ratt, and Great...
Jeff: White.


Great White have just signed to Sony.
Tom: They’ve signed to Sony?

Yeah, the guys signed them to Sony. You know like they got all dumped and they ended up on CMC, now they’re back. You’re going to have the Great Whiters twice bitten shy guys on you record label!
Jeff: That’s bullshit.
Tom: That’s fucked up.
Jeff: That’s not real, is it?

No, that’s true. They just got signed. In the brand new Metal Edge! In the brand new Metal Edge! Go check it out. In the brand new Ben... Metal Edge. Gerri Miller of Metal Edge. Is there anything else you would like to add, Tom and Jeff of Slayer, to the people out there?
Tom: Buy our records. Don’t buy theirs. (laughs)

Why should people care about Slayer? Why should people care?
Jeff: Because we’re important.
Tom: Because we care about the music we write.



All right, Tom! One last thing, could you just give one little scream, do you think, like you do on "Angel Of Death," you know, like you do? You know, "Aaaaaaah!!!"
Tom and Jeff: (laugh)


Can you just end the interview with that please? You know, "Aaaaaaah!!!" Just a little on together with me please? It’s been a fantasy I’ve been acting out all week.
Tom: Give me that bottle! I’m sure you can do a really good job when I shove a bottle up your butt! (laughs)

I like a broomhandle actually instead.
Tom: Let’s go get a broom! (laughs)

Please, Tom? Please, Tom of Slayer, one little one? Aaaaaaah!!!
Tom: There you go.

Doot doo... okay, Tom of Slayer, Tom and Jeff of Slayer, doot doola doot doo...
Tom and Jeff: (silence)

Tom and Jeff, doot doola doot doo...
Jeff: You’re bizarre.

Tom: Very good. That’s very good!

Signing the book!Tom! Tom? Aaaaaaah!!! Please? Please? Just one? Please? We’ll give you Hessian Obsession. Just one little angel? Aaaaaaah!!!
Tom: You’re going to give me this for that?

Yes, we will, for a scream.
Tom: I ain’t doing it! (laughs)
Slayer Handler: We’ve got to go.

Oh, please? Just one, Tom of Slayer, please? Aaaaaaah!!!
Tom: Aaaaaaah!!!

All right! Thank you so much! Thank you! I really appreciate that. Thank you, sir. Thank you. And keep on rockin’ in the free world. Oh!



  Part One, Part Two, Part Three
Back to the Pull-Down!  


Nardwuar vs. Slayer - Part 2 Nardwuar vs. Slayer - Part 1 Nardwuar vs. Slayer - Part 2 Nardwuar vs. Slayer - Part 1